Victoria James is a Certified Sex Therapist in Oklahoma City with a clinical focus on intimacy, sex, and relationship therapy.
Victoria James is a Certified Sex Therapist in Oklahoma City with a clinical focus on intimacy, sex, and relationship therapy.
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Counseling is a process of walking through a struggle with the support of a professional with whom you build a relationship. Counseling is not a “quick fix”, but an ongoing journey requiring participation and effort on both the part of the client and the clinician.
Sessions will look different depending on the person and their relationship with the counselor. Counselors typically ask questions to better understand your current situation and offer validation, support, and reflections to assist you in overcoming life’s challenges. There may be laughter, crying, or swearing—and all of that is okay.
Sex therapy is “normal” therapy with an emphasis on talking about sex and sexuality.
As with “normal” counseling, you can expect to talk with your counselor about the things that are hurting you. A sex therapist will ask questions to better understand what is happening for you, offer validation and support, provide education on sexual concerns, and perhaps offer suggestions for overcoming certain issues.
As a provider of sex therapy, I respect your comfort levels with sex. You get to decide what feels “right” and good for you—no one else. Yes, I am sex positive—but being sex positive means giving people the space to figure out what positive sex means for them, not prescribing wild sexual adventures. If having sex with more than one partner is a “no” for you, then it is a no for me as well.
Absolutely not. Sex therapy is a form of talk therapy—sessions and interactions with clients look very much like “normal” mental health therapy. I am bound by the ACA code of ethics as well as the state code of ethics for mental health clinicians; as with all therapists, I am prohibited from entering into a personal relationship with current or past clients.
I grew up in a very “sex positive” household; this means that the subject of sex was never taboo or off limits. Because of this, I found myself being comfortable with topics that others shied away from. It became clear as I grew up that sex was not something others were as comfortable talking about—and that discomfort was a source of a lot of pain in their lives. I saw a need for someone to have conversations about sex in a healthy, positive manner—and decided to fill that need.
Becoming a sex therapist means completing the general training necessary to become a counselor, plus additional training in the topic of human sexuality. As with all counselors, you begin by training and becoming licensed as a general mental health clinician. This means completing a masters program in mental health, marriage and family therapy, or social work. During and after, you undergo supervised work with clients. In order to become an AASECT certified sex therapist, you pursue further education in human sex and sexuality—as well as an additional supervisory experience with a Certified Sex Therapy Supervisor.
I do not take insurance a this time.
The length of counseling is dependent on the client. I do not take a “one size fits all” approach, so it is hard to give an estimate for number of sessions. Counseling takes as long as it needs to take. The goal of counseling from session one should always be to get you to a place where you no longer need the support of the therapeutic relationship.
If you are in crisis, please call 911.
If you are having suicidal thoughts, please reach out to a hotline: 1-800-273-8255
It will take longer than you’d like, but not as long as you fear.